Low Self-Esteem Revealed
In another great article by Anneli Rufus in the on-line Spirituality & Health page, she discusses 10 signs of low self-esteem. As a Certified Hypnotherapist at Skipnotherapy in Salem, Oregon, most of the clients I see have significantly low self-esteem – almost always with origins in childhood as the result of verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. The low self-esteem they experience leads to all kinds of psychological, behavioral and physical manifestations, and the reason they come to see me initially, is not really the issue that needs attending to. For instance, someone comes to me for weight loss and during our interview together we find out they were derided as a child by older siblings, parents, relatives, a neighbor, friends, or whoever for some aspect or trait. It may have been because they were slightly overweight, or simply picked on by someone who thought it might make themselves feel better to ridicule or tease someone else (my client).
The subconscious mind accepts everything at face value, and then looks to see if what it has heard is correct. Taunting by someone else for the same issue, or repeated taunting by the original “bully” usually does the trick, and the client fulfills his or her “destiny” by continuing to be overweight, accepting it as “who they are.” Ditto that for poor performance in school (“You are so stupid”), self-worth (“You are worthless”), confused or aberrant sexual behavior or ideas after having been sexually abused, or any of thousands of other issues clients manifest.
In the article by Rufus ( which you can read here) she lists 10 signs that are common in those with low-self-esteem, such as being indecisive, giving up easily, deflecting praise, and so on. Make no mistake – these are not the ONLY signs or commonalities of people with low-self-esteem, but they are certainly present in many instances.
So how does one change the arc of their behavior and begin to repair their self-esteem? The best way I know of is through hypnotherapy. Re-framing the original cause, what we call the Initial Sensitizing Event, allows the client to gain a new understanding of the original “offense” and to view it from the perspective of their present self – as an adult. This changes the whole belief the client has maintained about their self for a whole lifetime, and allows them to then move forward with a new belief, with new resolve, a new outlook, and renewed self-esteem. All of the other problems that stemmed from the low self-esteem often begin to fall away, and dramatic improvements in other aspects of the clients’ lives are common. It is difficult to drill-down by one’s self to determine the root of aspects they would like to change, but it is much more achievable by an experienced therapist.
If you or someone you care about suffers from low self-esteem, there is help! Please contact me in Salem, Oregon at www.skipnotherapy.com for more information or to set up an appointment.